Sunday, April 17, 2011

Rolling Up Hope

Today's Topic: Winning "Free" Stuff

I love getting free stuff. Or what seems like "free" stuff. No matter what anyone ever tells you, there is always a catch to getting something free. Nothing, especially in this economic state, is free anymore. You have to spend something to make anything, even if it means spending your time. More times then not, anything that you get for free, comes with a string attached to it, an obligation or a responsibility. But the fact that it's "free," gets our attention 100% of the time. At least when I throw myself at the "free"stuff only to be rejected, I'm asked to "please play again." Isn't that nice?

You really have to hand it to the fine folks at Tim Horton's. Roll up the Rim could possibly be the best marketing strategy any restaurant chain has ever come up with. I would imagine that coffee sales skyrocket for the six-eight weeks the roll up the rim contest takes place. A 1 in 6 chance of winning seem like okay odds. However, technically speaking, your chances are much worse then that, especially the longer the contest continues. How many of us go in to Tim Horton's year after year without even winning so much as a donut? The strategy of roll up the rim is almost to get as many people into the coffee shops as possible, getting regulars to bring their friends for the excitement of rolling up a cup, with the hopes and pipe dreams of winning a new BBQ or car. I would like to know one thing though...if someone buys you a coffee, and you win a prize, who ultimately should get the prize? Do you count it as a "gift"? Does whomever made the transaction take credit for the prize? I remember reading about two best friends fighting over a coffee cup that rolled up a car. Oh yes, it went to the courts. Outcome went to the individual who drank the coffee, thus making it her property, and the other had to plea that the coffee "was intended as a gesture and token of good faith." Really? I bet those two are still friends (sarcasm).

I often wonder how fate determines who walking among us gets the stroke of good luck. Lottery winners, coffee drinkers, fast food eaters, gamblers and just ordinary everyday citizens; life can turn around and change for you in a split second. One night you go to bed broke, and the next you could wake up, wondering if today is the day you make it big. So many people hold onto hope like a last resource of life, clutching a lottery ticket like it's made of pure gold or sipping a roll up the rim coffee, wondering if you're one sip closer to making life "easier" for yourself and those around you. Even McDonald's gets in on the free stuff giveaway, by proclaiming that eating their food is more socially acceptable when the Monopoly sweepstakes is taking place. Of course, they make it seem like the million is in reach, by giving every average joe the "Park Place" piece. Oh wow! If I could just find Boardwalk, I would be a millionaire. The reality? There is one game piece world wide. Your odds of winning it are literally in the hundreds of millions. I hate the people that stuff their face and say to me, "You can't win if you don't play!" Actually, I can win if I don't play. By not stuffing fat ingested piles of lard and reprocessed Grade D beef into my body just for the hope that I "might" find the winning game piece, I am winning.

Free stuff is never free. You don't ever win a "free" coffee during roll up the rim. You pay to win a "free" coffee. Ironic right? You don't ever win money when you gamble. You pay money in the hopes that you will win a prize. The word "free" has become the perfect marketing tool to get our attention, in the hope that one day we too can become the person on the television saying "Tim Horton's changed my life." I mean by all means, spend the money, but do it for the right reason (if there is one).